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Not so long ago, in last year or the previous year before that, I remembered that i had one of my goals being “stop complaining so much”. I thought i did rather well in that department. I thought i had already cut down my whinning. Learn to take things in my stride. And be happy with the little things in life. All until something that happened this week taught me otherwise.

On wednesday night i was told that i would be needed to commit 1 day of the weekend in this week & next week. Needless to say i was pissed, why must i be the one to be doing it on back to back weekends. Damn. Ain’t very fair to me since i’m going to be leaving for overseas in another 2 weeks time. This is just like sucking me dry before i go. I was irritated although i dont have very important plans on these days. I just dont like to lose precious weekends like this.

Then after a while of self-complaining, i received a more terrible news. I might be needed to depart early on this sunday. Which is like 4 days away from wednesday. The damage of this news was not on the date being brought forward but rather i would be required to be away for 1 month instead of the original 2 weeks that i was told. I was shocked & my heart went into screen-saver mode.

4 days of preparations to be away for 4 weeks. How can that be possible ? What’s gonna happen to the things that i was going to do or planning to do. At that very moment, i really wished that i could be doing the back to back weekends instead. At least i can still have some weekends leftover.

Then in the next few days to come, i was living under the constant fear of the possibility of being tasked to leave on sunday. At any moment the bomb could be dropped on me. Until today, friday; that i was cleared of this threat. Now i’m officially leaving 2 weeks later. After hearing the news, i felt relieved. I felt delighted, delighted that i was able to do the back to back weekends instead.

How’s this happening to me ? Losing 2 days of weekends yet i’m still happy. Why ? By right i’m supposed to be leaving 2 weeks later. By right i should not be even doing back to back weekends. But yet now i’m thankful for being able to do it.

This is how life teaches us not to take things for granted. Always be contented with what you have, rather than being calculative of what you had lost. Because putting your focus on the stuffs you had lost, you’re always counting the stuffs you lost. Never taking into account the things you’ve gained or already had.

I always thought that i had the capability to look beyond the little obstacles of losing stuffs. The theory of half glass empty or half glass filled. I always knew that the better perspective would be the half glass filled. I knew i should be looking at it with half glass filled but somehow subconsciously my brain is still focused on the half emptied glass. The void to the brim. The gap to perfection.

It was until more is being taken from me then i realized that actually what i had in the first place aint that bad after all. Is this greed ? Is this the way humans are meant to be by being wanting for more ? I don’t know. All I know is that once again i see another flaw in myself that i need to work on. Its funny how such situations can trigger thoughts & emotions to generate harsh but truthful reflections upon oneself.